Self-Care


I had a really good conversation with a friend a few weeks ago at a powwow in Durant, OK. Part of the discussion was about self-care. How important it is, and the different ways she has found to do this for herself. 

My boss and colleagues talk about self-care. We are therapists so it’s vitally important to us and our clients that we stay healthy: physically, mentally and emotionally. Speaking only for myself, I add spiritual health to the list. Self-care is for everyone because we all have our own stress that is unique to each one of us. 

I honestly used to believe that self-care meant a pedicure or massage, or making sure I get a workout in. Massages and pedicures cost money, and many times I don’t want to spend the money. Sometimes I’m too tired or busy to workout, or it feels too strenuous to be self-care….sometimes it seems like self-torture, and who wants to do that? 

After we got our dog, I quickly discovered how therapeutic a loving dog truly is. He loves to snuggle, as the picture shows. I can always feel my stress melt away when he, and now our 2nd dog Sissy, come running to greet me after work. I realized how much our big puppies contribute to our wellbeing and how they contribute to our self-care needs. 

So here is another bulleted list, this time of self-care ideas. Some from my friend and some I’ve discovered myself. And most of them cost little to nothing except time. 

  • Coffee at home in quiet and solitude 
  • Reading a book
  • Taking a walk
  • Walking or snuggling my big puppies 
  • Having friends/family over for a simple breakfast/lunch/dinner
  • Watching a TedTalk on YouTube
  • Taking a bath. I did this recently and used Epsom Salts, lavender oil, a pure beeswax candle, and played my music on a Bluetooth speaker
  • Actually picking up the phone and calling a friend or family member to visit. So much better than texting. 
  • Sitting outside in the evening after it’s dark and looking at the sky
  • Using a meditation app
  • Getting out of the house to do something not work or housework related – go watch a youth or high school or local college game
  • Check out a new walking path in your city
  • Laugh
  • Dance 
  • Bake something from scratch and enjoy with a cup of your favorite hot beverage
  • Write in a journal 
  • Breathing exercises
  • Self-massage techniques
  • Go to a meeting (if in a 12-Step program)
  • Plan a game night with friends
  • USE the fancy coffee mug for your morning coffee
  • Visit your local library
  • Paint ceramics
  • Color with crayons or markers or pencils, either free-hand or a coloring book
  • Have a morning ritual that involves spirituality and gratitude 
  • Make a new music playlist 

These are just some ideas that I hope gets people thinking about how they can take care of themselves. I’ve learned the importance of nourishing not only my body, but my mind, my heart and my spirit. I can’t be my best for my family or my job if I ignore what I need. 

Morning Ramblings

I’ve been feeling the urge to write again. But my mind is going in several different directions at once. I’m just going to list all the thoughts as they come to me. 

  • As soon as I hit the bulleted list button for this entry, my mind went blank
  • I need a long extended break from the news for self-care purposes 
  • I made flash cards yesterday of Dakota words and phrases 
  • We have 2 dogs now, and they are loved like my human children
  • I love Twitter accounts that make me laugh and inspire me 
  • Reading is a joy
  • Every woman of color should read Iyanla VanZant’s book “Peace From the Broken Pieces”
  • I didn’t realize how much I needed to recognize, accept, and let go of until my life became unmanageable
  • Gratitude is real and valuable
  • I love my babies
  • I wonder how annoying and preachy I used to be on social media 
  • I am beginning to understand what “self-care” really is and to make sure I do it
  • Self care doesn’t always mean shelling out $$ for massages. 
  • Fear has been the basis for much of my thought processes and decisions for years
  • I thought about giving up coffee and just drinking tea 
  • I give up that thought within moments of having it
  • I love kind people
  • I wish I could do yoga without hip pain. It looks so peaceful 
  • I have an affinity for finding good memes
  • I’m looking forward to turning 50

Maybe I’ll write more ramblings tomorrow. This feels like a good way to get back in the blogging game.